Sujet : Jessie, my sweetie new flatmate :)
Alors en ce moment je cherche un logement à Londres par internet et j'ai en particulier reçu cette offre :
Greetings to you.
My Name is Jessie, I am a dual citizen half British/ half Italian. I have an available clean and ideal Flat share right now at a very reasonable fee in Centre London. I am looking for Student, Professional and Couples with someone that is okay with my kind of person and most especially a trustworthy person, a Clean and Tidy and person that I could confide in as a friend and family and that could confide in me as well and I believed you would be the kind of person. You could contact me now via my personal email on ( email@example.com )For More Details about my full flat details with the pictures of my flat.
Jusqu'ici tout va bien, elle a l'air un peu concon mais, bon, je demande plus d'infos.
Hi My Futureflatmate,
Thanks for your swift response and the interest you showed in my flat. (...) I Am a very laid back person and also, I am open minded and free with everyone. I am looking for Student, Professional and Couples with someone that is okay with my kind of person and most especially a trustworthy person, a Clean and Tidy and person that I could confide in as a friend and family and that could confide in me as well and I believed you would be the kind of person. Wimpole Street is moments from excellent amenities and close to 24hr shop and all amenities.The nearest underground tube station to my house is Oxford Circus tube station' which is about 3 minutes walk to my flat.
ABOUT ME: I am Miss Jessie Ella Scott , 23 yrs old, Female a Half British/ Half Italian girl, Straight and I am Professional Hair Stylist. I am open minded, love listening to music, cooking, reading, visiting cities, going to theatres ... I also particularly enjoy meeting new people expectially roommate, new nationalities; I have been living with Americans, Spanish, Canadian, French and Italians as my previous flatmates.
Location and Room Rent Details:
ADDRESS: Wimpole Street,London, GREATER LONDON W1G 8AP, England
AREA: Central London (Lambeth, Soho, Belgravia, Southwark, The City, Westminster).
81 GBP weekly
350 GBP monthly
THE PROOF OF DEPOSIT: £400.00 Pounds is the payment of Security Deposit implies that you have a serious intention towards renting my flat and that would enable me to secure the flat room for you. Because I have had lots of flatmates that eventually ended up giving me stories of their financial distress. Am just trying as much as I can to avoid the same thing happening to me again. The sum of £400.00 security deposit is fully refundable back to you without any charges. The details of Security Deposit will be sent to you in the Agreement form. If this is okay by you, get back to me with your Full names and the contact Address so that I can send the contract and flat terms to you by email.
ROOM AND APARTMENT DESCRIPTION
I have a flat available as of today in Greater London ideally located with BEDROOMS and BATHROOMS (one ensuite), a modern kitchen and a spacious living room. Personal Bathroom/toilet attached to each room.. You will have your own private Bedroom and Bathroom/Toilet separately. But we would share KITCHEN reception and SITTING ROOM only. It's fully furnished, DG, GCH, bath/wc, 24 hrs Security and Porter Service available and entry phone.
If you are really seriously interested in my flat please be quick to avoid disappointment I will like you to get back to me with your Full Name, Residence Address and Phone Number now so that I can prepare the Agreement Form for you to read the Terms & Condition and sign. If you are satisfy with the Terms and Condition then we will proceed..
I look forward to hearing back from you ASAP.
Donc là, mon détecteur à bullshit explose : appart' somptueux, loyer ridiculement bas, plein centre et "proof of deposit" -> grosse arnaque crasse.
Comme j'ai beaucoup de temps libre j'ai décidé de déconner un peu avec cette vilaine pute de Jessie.
Hi Jessie, it's so good to hear from you again!
Let me introduce myself, my name is Jean-Claude Porcin (you can call me Jean-Claude), I'm a 22 years old French guy and I'm studying computer science. I'm coming to London in a few weeks and I'd love to share a flat with you! You seem to be exactly the kind of nice and trustworthy person I need to live with.
I've seen your flat's picture and let me tell you, I really dig what I'm seeing ! It looks so clean and classy...
The rent is ok I guess, is £81 really the exact sum I'll have to pay each month? I think it's a fair deal. If your OK with my candidature, just do explain to me the next step of the procedure, I'll do it quickly.
I'm really looking forward to hear from you! Bye or "Ciao" should I say to honour your noble heritage!
PS: Personal picture attached, I'd love to see yours if it's ok with you of course.
Avec bien sûr, ma photo :
Réponse rapide de Jessie (je crois que je lui plait) :
Thanks for the mail and your interested in my flat. Before we can proceed now, I will like you to get back to me with your Full Name, Residence Address and Phone Number now so that I can prepare the Agreement Form for you to read the Terms & Condition and sign. If you are satisfy with the Terms and Condition then we will proceed.
Nouvelle réponse de ma part :
I'm so delighted you're interested in my candidature. I can't wait to live with you in that wonderful flat.
My full name is : Jean-Claude Germaine PORCIN and my complete address is : 23 avenue du général margueritte 75007 Paris, France.
I'm afraid I can't provide a phone number right now : I don't have a house line and I just suspended my cell phone account.
Please do send me the agreement form.
Also I have a question, is your flat pet friendly ? I have a dog (a Bouvier Bernois) called Veronique and I wish very much to have it with me. It's very clean and educated so I don't think it's going to be a problem. I you want so, I shall send you a picture.
PS: I'm still waiting eagerly for your picture
Et dernière réponse en date de ma future colocatrice :
Hi My sweetie flatmate,
Thanks again for the details you provide me. It's not a problem and I will lovely to have your dog with you when you are coming to my flat. I am really much happy for you to be my new flatmate and can't wait to see you soon in my Flat. I could reserve my flat room for you. I have attached the Tenancy Agreement Form with my British Passport pages. You would need to read and sign it by writing your name at the end of the page I mean under my name as soon as you finished with it, you will Re-attached it back to me as soon as possible today and bring it along with you.
But, the prove security deposit is actually to measure if you could afford to meet up with monthly payment and also to know how much you need the flatshare. I have had lots of flatmates that eventually ended up giving me stories of their financial distress. Am just trying as much as I can to avoid the same thing happening to me again.
1) You dont need to pay me the rent fees rightnow, you can pay me the 1 month rent when you finally move into my flat. So what you will need to do now, you will need to transfer the amount £750 (1 month rent and security deposit) to your name (as Receiver) as a proof. Simple, Just go to your nearest post office through Western Union Money Transfer outlet location, they would be given you a slip to fill and you will fill your details details below
SENDER NAME( Your Brother or Sister name),
RECEIVER NAME (Your Name),
SENDER ADDRESS( Your address ),
RECEIVER ADDRESS( Our Flat address which is my flat address in UK) and
2) Scan & Send a copy of the Western Union Money Transfer transaction receipt as a proof of the transaction
3) Then, the room would be reserve for you and we will meet for viewing.
4) If you decide to take the room after the viewing my flat, you will go to any local Western Union Money Transfer office to withdraw the money back and pay me the rent fees. (You don't need to come with cash to view, after viewing we will go together, you will cancel the transfer and withdraw the money to pay me)
5) The Keys will be handed over to you after viewing.
I am pretty sure that the transaction at Western Union Money Transfer office will require some charges, i will definitely refund the transaction charges back to you upon viewing and if you don't see what i sent as pictures of my flat to you, you are free to leave without paying me anything.
I only want to be sure that you wouldn't be going to waste my time at this moment and i think with this condition, both of us can be sure we would not wasting each other time.
I will only rely on your honesty that you have made the transaction so that i can reserve the flat room for you. Let me know if you are okay with this so that we can proceed. Thanks so much while i will be waiting to read from you and i am looking forward to meet you.
Avec en bonus track une photocopie de son passeport :
Je n'ai pas encore rédigé ma future réponse, j'attends vos suggestions.